communication – The Words Of David C. Frampton

Restore Truthfulness

dscn0099 Psalm 12:3-4

May the Lord cut off all flattering lips, The tongue that speaks great things; Who have said, “With our tongue we will prevail; Our lips are our own; who is lord over us?” (NASB)

In our previous article on Psalm 12, we heard the Psalmist David’s cry to the Lord because of the steep decline of godly people in his land. Notice that the focus is on people and not merely the actions of people. Godliness and ungodliness, truthfulness and lying are not mystical characteristics floating around in society. All these manifest themselves in the thoughts, ideas, attitudes and actions of people. True Christianity does not dwell in the realm of abstract concepts. It looks at people and desires to see people change. It also knows that only the Spirit of God can produce real, spiritual change in the hearts and lives of people. Jesus answered and said to him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God” (John 3:3 NASB).

In verses three and four, David prayed that the Lord would act against those were evil communicators. We hear such people speak evil constantly. David mentioned “empty talk, smooth talk, and double talk” in verse two (Kidner, Psalms 1-72), and in verse three, flatterers again. Lies, slander, malice, and oppressive pride abound among our people. How often have we heard of verbal abuse or been targets of the same? Our political process is poisoned by those who sin with their tongues. They speak “great things” in their minds, but it is only great evil flowing out of corrupt hearts. Brood of vipers! How can you speak good things when you are evil? For the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart (Matthew 12:34 HCSB).

The Psalmist’s request might make us shudder. He prayed that the Lord would cut off all flattering lips. This is a prayer, not for grace, but for judgment. David, who lived under the law covenant, prayed according to the penalty of that covenant for those who broke it. We can easily adopt that same attitude. However, we must remember that our time is the day of grace. Look, now is the acceptable time; now is the day of salvation (2 Corinthians 6:2 HCSB). If people do not repent, God will cut them off, but we ought to pray that he will pour out his grace and mercy on the people of our land. Abusive, malicious, lying words are destroying our people.

Verse four exposes the root of their problem: It is their pride. They assume that no one rules over them. They imagine that they can achieve their goals by their words, and that they can say what they please without consequences. We all can fall into this trap. We imagine that we can say and do what we want, and if we should run into problems because of what we’ve done, we will be able to talk ourselves out of it. How many marriages have been ruined by this twisted idea! How many people oppress their coworkers with cruel or arrogant talk, confident that they have the right to injure others! But the Lord knows, and he will act in his time. Let us pray that he acts in grace before it is his time for judgment.

What people say matters to the Lord. This includes you and me. While we may become upset and angry over the abusive, malicious language around us, let us not add to it. Lord, please help us to speak words of love, kindness, and peace. Begin to restore truthfulness by changing the words we say.

Grace and peace, David

Thinking about the Faithful God

Hebrews 10:23

Theology is the study of God; it is the proper study of God’s people. He is the starting point of our world and life view. Since we are in a personal relationship with the Maker and Preserver of all things, we seek to understand what he has told has about himself. As we grasp his majesty, we are capable of making better sense of ourselves and the world he has placed us in. So we can say that the study of God is one of the most practical activities that we can engage in. The writer of Hebrews has told us in this great paragraph to hold fast our profession. The second part of verse twenty-three tells us of the motivating force to obey the command in the first part of this verse. Why should we obey? “For he who promised is faithful”.

Remember some basic ideas about our faithful God. When we talk about the living God with people in our generation, we need to define what we mean by the word “God”. Don’t assume that your neighbor has the same ideas that you have. They will define “God” according to whatever their religious philosophy is—Hindu, Buddhist, Islam, pagan, new age, religious existentialist, etc. Let’s think about two truths concerning the true and living God that relate to our subject.

God is personal. We need to listen carefully to what God has said about his nature and what people say about their “god”. God is not an impersonal force to be manipulated by people. God is a tri-personal being. Yes, he is infinitely greater than we are, but he is personal as we are. We must accept God as he reveals himself. We cannot recast God to conform to our opinions. God tells us that he is Father, Son and Holy Spirit; one God in three persons. Certainly this is very difficult to understand, because we know of no other being like him. But our lack of comprehension does not give us the right to reinterpret reality according to our whims. There are many parts of higher mathematics that the average person does not comprehend. That lack of comprehension doesn’t alter the reality of mathematics.

God is a communicator. God speaks to us in language we can understand. He could have spoken in a way that no human could understand, but that would not have agreed with his purpose to make himself and the way of salvation known to us. To speak to us clearly, God chose three human languages (Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic) and the thought forms, idioms, and qualities of each of those languages. In doing this, the living God was able to make known the truth about himself and how to know him.

God gives us statements that we can rely on. For example, he has told us that he is eternal, all-powerful, and compassionate. This provides us with confidence in him when we grieve over departed loved ones, feel the weakness of our human flesh, and feel miserable. The Lord God makes promises to us out of his desire to draw us to himself that we might experience the wonder and joy of who he is. For example, Jesus said, “Come to Me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28 HCSB). We might feel helpless and hopeless, but Jesus’ words encourage us that he will rescue us from the guilt and punishment due us for our sins.

So then, God’s revelation about his nature, fuels our confidence in the faithful God. If we follow God’s example in talking with our neighbors in this way, then we can share with them the promises that God makes to people who will turn to him and trust in him through Christ.

Grace and peace, David

Life Changer

Micah 1:1-3

We all know of many events that change people’s lives: learning to walk and to talk, going to school, graduating from high school and college, getting a job, losing that job, finding a new job, getting married, having children, and many more. Most of these happen to most people. Once we experience a life changer, our lives are forever altered. We might assume we’re the same person, but the life changer modifies us and our view of life in various ways. When people in our culture contemplate life changing events, it is usually from a very individualistic angle. They start from themselves and work outward, perhaps including other people of significance to them in their deliberations. It is rare to think of God at such times.

Perhaps, it is even rarer to think of God as the Life Changer, to see him in all the events of our lives, including the ones we think are common and the ones that disrupt our lives. What? Would God disrupt our lives? Would he disrupt them without asking our permission? Yes, my friends, he does step into the course of our lives to alter them. This is what happened to Micah one day. We do not know much about him. His message was more important than the man that delivered it. Why can I say that? Because the message he gave was the word of the Lord.

God used the message he communicated through Micah to change him and to be his instrument to change us by the power of the Holy Spirit. Micah tells us that the word of the Lord came to him over a number of years during the reigns of three kings of the kingdom of Judah. This would make him a contemporary of the prophets Hosea and Isaiah. This information tells us his place in the story of God’s glory in Jesus Christ. He proclaimed the Lord’s message around 750 years before the resurrection of Jesus from the dead. Micah would be used to tell God’s people important information about the birth of Jesus the Messiah. But for now, think of his place in God’s story and that you and I who follow Jesus also have a place in the same story, since we are in Christ. Nearly two thousand years after the resurrection, God is using his word in and through us.

The message that came to Micah was in the form of a vision (cf. Hebrews 1:1). He saw God’s message displayed before him, so that he could tell it to all who read his words. He saw what God would do (1:3-7) and how he and others would respond to what the Lord would do (1:8-16). God’s word proclaims his actions. It tells people like us how he steps into our lives in judgment and salvation. It lets us know his explanation for his actions (for example, 1:5-7; 7:18). In his vision Micah saw what concerned Samaria and Jerusalem, the capital cities of Israel and Judah. The Lord God takes notice of what happens in the leading cities of the world, like Washington and London. Cities are gatherings of people and what they do is under God’s eyes.

God expects all people to listen to his message (1:2). God’s word speaks to us with his final authority. The word communicates the person, message, and work of the Lord Jesus Christ, who is the Judge of all (John 5:21-30). Understand this clearly. God’s word is his living and active communication (Hebrews 4:12-13) that is final authority for what we believe and how we live (2 Timothy 3:16-17). In the Bible God gives a witness against people, which means that we have a problem! He tells us that he will act against anyone who does not listen to him, which means that you can complicate your problem dramatically. Yet the Lord tells us that there is a way of peace with him that is available for all who follow the Lord Jesus (5:4-5).

My friend, has the written word of God come to you with power, so that your way of life and your destiny is forever changed? Micah had his life altered by God’s word. How is the message concerning Jesus the Messiah changing you today?

Grace and peace, David

Communication: Talking Like Jesus (Part Two)

Ephesians 4:20-32

When we speak like Jesus, we will be pursuing the proper goal or purpose of building up others.

Gospel-focused communication will be spiritually constructive. This agrees with the purpose of discipleship, that is, of teaching disciples (Matthew 28:20; 1 Corinthians 12:7). God wants us to build up the body of believers. Talking like Jesus in constructive speech is part of your function in the spiritual body of Christ. The head (Christ) is sending out beneficial messages to each of his members, and we are to spread those beneficial messages to other members. This means we seek the improvement of the people of a local assembly (church) by the way we speak and what we speak. No sane contractor would seek to harm the building he was under contract to construct. Yet how many Christians pull others down by gossip, slander, cutting comments, or a simple lack of gentleness or compassion? And how few deliberately intend to help others improve spiritually, which is the point at hand? Building up one another rarely happens in a quick conversation on a Sunday morning. Such words can be constructive, but they are limited by time. Every Christian needs to be in a small group.

Constructive speech aims to build up, especially where the brother or sister in Christ has a need. What are some needs that we all have from time to time?

Rebuke (Galatians 2:14; Titus 1:13b)
Instruction (Acts 18:26)
Encouragement (Acts 11:23)

When we speak like Jesus, we will keep our words within some wise guidelines. The entire life of Jesus shows his use of wise words at all times. Will the way I am about to talk build up this person like Jesus does, or will it provoke sinful attitudes or responses? Here are some examples:

Is my communication sexually suggestive? Sex is a normal part of life. God created it! But improper words can arouse desires that should not be. Talk about sexual matters wisely.
Is my communication inducing the other person to anger? The point is to use some common sense to avoid words that are pushing the other person’s buttons.
Is my communication causing fear or doubts? Don’t spread despair amid the general gloom! TV newscasters are paid to spread doom and gloom, but wise words lead people to confident expectation (hope) in God.

What benefits does this conversation intend to seek in the heart and life my brother or sister in Christ? Have I thought this through before I speak? Actually what good will it do? To talk about some subjects with some people is an exercise in futility, because they do not what to listen or change. Consider Jesus’ teaching (Matthew 7:6). Can I turn this conversation in a spiritually profitable direction? Some cannot be, or it is not the time nor the place. We must use discernment; this requires skill. To what degree does this conversation display “true righteousness and holiness” (4:24)? Jesus our Lord used his words to teach about God the Father and to make us think with an eternal perspective. How are your words doing that?

Grace and peace, David

Communication: Talking Like Jesus (Part One)

Ephesians 4:20-32

A few years ago, it was rather popular for Christian youth to be wearing clothes and trinkets with the initials “WWJD”, meaning “What would Jesus do?” Like most modern fads, it was short-lived. Hopefully, it at least was used by God to get some people to think seriously about how authentic their relationship to Jesus actually was. “How can you call yourself a follower of Christ, if you fail to follow him?” is always a legitimate question.

When we focus on communicating like Jesus, it would be very easy to construct whatever model of “talking like Jesus” one desired by a selective citation of a few texts from the Gospels. Join that defective method with a couple emotionally charged illustrations, and you have a ready made heresy. For example, we could turn to Matthew 15 and paint an anti-religious establishment Jesus. That would sound very appealing to “they like Jesus but not the church so we worship in nature” crowd. Or we could read the last part of Luke 8 to emphasize the compassionate speech of Jesus. That approach would endear us to those who want a therapeutic Jesus. Or John 6 would be an excellent introduction to Jesus the theologian, valiantly standing for truth as the crowds walk away. The folks in the institutional, confessional church model like that one. Or perhaps we should open our Bibles to Mark 13 to hear the prophetic Jesus, since in troubled times people want to hear of escape from the turmoil of life. Many escapist Christians love to hear about prophecy above all other things. But then what would we do with Matthew 23? Oh, have you never read it? Should we model our speech after the way he speaks there: “woe to you”? The “angry Jesus clearing out the temple” model appeals to people angry about how their preferred view of culture is being ruined.

My point is that we must always be cautious when we approach the subject of talking or acting like Jesus. Are we hearing only part of what the Spirit has revealed about Christ that is being presented as the whole of what Jesus is and what we should be? The text before us presents a model of communication for talking like Jesus. However, let us remember that it is not all of what an authentic Christ-focused model is. In order to communicate like Jesus, we must draw from his full story, and not merely our preferred passages. Obviously, this could be material for a book. With the preceding caution in mind, let’s consider this idea. To speak like Jesus means to speak in a constructive manner.

When we speak like Jesus, we will rid our conversation of words that are destructive. As a general principle, we will seek to eliminate “unwholesome” talk (Ephesians 4:29). The Lord Jesus never engaged in unwholesome words. The apostle chose a colorful word. Consider a couple literal usages in the New Testament Scriptures. It is used of “spoiled fish” (Matthew 13:48) and of “decayed trees” or “rotten fruit” (Matthew 12:33). From the immediate context in Ephesians, we can find specific examples of unwholesome talk: falsehood (4:25), bitterness (4:31), shouting (4:31), slander (4:31), foolish talk (5:4), and impure or coarse jokes (5:4). A helpful exercise might be to journal the type of words that you use during a week. Write examples of unwholesome words on a sheet of paper, and then put check marks next to them when you know that you have used such words. The goal is a simple reality check for you. Or in your small group (you are in a small group, right?) discuss the subject of unwholesome words together. In what area does most of the group struggle? How can you help each other?

According to this text, we must take charge of eliminating unwholesome talk from the way we talk. “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths” is about as blunt and directive a command as any in the Bible. We must accept the Holy Spirit’s authority to order us to speak like Jesus. This is not a suggestion, if you want to be “nice”. It is of the essence of new covenant life. We should not minimize these sins of the tongue. “I say that when there is any loose and filthy talk, or talk tending to give liberty to evil, it is just as if speech was being used to poison men’s souls” (Calvin).

There is a better way. Maximize what Christ can do in you by the Holy Spirit. How does this happen? Use wholesome words to strengthen others. Since all followers of Christ are members of his spiritual body, we have an opportunity with the help of the Holy Spirit to be part of significant changes in the lives of others. Effective communication can be very powerful. The hearts of the wise make their mouths prudent, and their lips promote instruction. Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones (Proverbs 16:23-24 NIV).

Grace and peace, David

Communication: A New Starting Point (Part One)

Colossians 3:16-17

We live in a paradoxical time. We have access to an unparalleled amount of information at speeds beyond the imagination of anyone living before 1980. Yet, in spite of all this information, we are losing the ability to communicate with one another. One evidence of this is the divorce rate. A staggering amount of marriages end within ten years. A constant problem in failing or failed marriages is the lack of ability to communicate. When talking with couples that are married or who want to be married, the mentor puts communication high on the priority list of items to work through with the couple. As we approach this important area of life, I think it is important to avoid a new legalism; you know something like “Ten Steps to Great Communication!” Let’s seek a new starting point.

Communication starts with who you are. For the follower of Christ, this means that we are new people in Christ, God’s adult sons and daughters. We cannot change the way the ungodly communicate. A basic principle operates in every human. Our words come out of our hearts (the inner person). See Matthew 12:33-37; Luke 6:45. Destructive words come from destructive hearts (Matthew 15:19); this is the way of life for people who do not follow Christ (Romans 3:13-14). To tell an ungodly person how to reform their way of talk is to provide a temporary, inadequate fix.

We used to live in a house with ongoing water leaks. Once we discovered a leak in our house, as a ceiling tile fell to the floor. The proper procedure was to repair the leak. We did not go out and buy a new ceiling tile, put it in place, without fixing the leak, and then say, “Our problem is solved!”

Those who follow Christ have experienced a radical change. We are no longer what we were, but we are new in Christ. The old inner person has been put off, and a new inner person has been put on (Colossians 3:9-10). As you carefully read the text, you will see that the new inner person is not perfect but is experiencing continual renewal. As J.I. Packer said, it is like we live in a house that is being renovated, and sometimes we have to deal with the dust and trash of renovation. But it is this radical change and ongoing renewal that gives us a new starting point. If you believe in Christ, you are new in Christ. Now live like the new person you are, not the like the old person you used to be. By faith live in conformity with your new life that you have through union with Christ. Our problems come when we don’t live by faith in Christ and try to deal with life in a fleshly manner. A new pattern of life happens as we keep in step with the Holy Spirit (cf. Gal 5:19-26). The Spirit acts within us to renew us according to Christ (Colossians 3:8-9). A married couple who knows Christ can say to each other, “Honey, the Lord has fixed the leaks in our hearts! Now he will help us clean up the mess and redecorate!” The first step in communication change is to know the Ascended Christ by faith and then to act by the Spirit in conformity with him.

Grace and peace, David